Thursday, July 30, 2009

The End of Digitanus, a Parable About Modern Times

AKA: Gullible’s Travels

Today, right now, in another universe(V3.5) just a few universes down the block (so to speak) there is a world known as Digitanus. The people of Digitanus are extremely argumentative, and are able to block movement in any direction; politically, economically or socially through their arguments over foolish and bizarre subjects. Interestingly, there are several hierarchically arranged varieties of beings in Digitanus. These varieties are based on the number of digits on the extensor limb with which the Digitanusites interact with their physical environment. Those with two digits, one in opposition are known as the bigits and they hate all the other categories of Digitanusites since they have conquered all the various lands in the central continent of Digitanus. Those with three digits, one in opposition, known as the tripatiums are the indigenous people of the central continent, and have been driven into several small compounds by the bigits. Those with four digits, one in opposition, known as the quadigits had been the slaves of the bigits for hundreds of years until a great natural conflagration forced all the digits to work together in order to save their world. Never the less, the bigits still hate the tripatiums and the quadrigits and visa versa.

All digits, no matter their particular racial and ethnic background grow an additional digit as they reach maturity, and this digit is responsible for pollination and an extremely multifaceted budding process that necessitates an extensive “procreation” care system in order to assure continuation of the species. The system that developed historically is woefully inadequate, and many of the digits of Digitanus are not insured to cover the expenses involved in their budding. Because the professionals who deliver the services necessary to pollination and budding - individual private interest groups that manufacture products necessary to the pollination of the extra digit, and the government bureaucracy that maintains the pollination system all have their own interests in maintaining the status quo - the infant mortality rate, and death among adults due to diseases of the extra digit are both extremely high. The deaths are so extensive that they threaten the well being of the entire race of Digitanusites. Try and try as they might the Digitanusites are unable to come to an agreement about fixing that system, and their health care costs become more and more expensive with each passing year. Ultimately these costs will conspire to sink the economy of Digitanus.

Amazingly, a sub group of bigits has decided that their new king - a champion of fixing the healthcare system, and the first quadigit to hold that office - is not from their planet and therefore can’t be their king. Indeed they accuse him/it of being from another universe (V3.6) despite all proof to the contrary! As a result of the constant brobdingnagian arguments over the origin of their leader and their failing health care system the social and economic structure of Digitanus is gradually sliding into a state of entropy. Everything will constantly slow down until finally, nothing will grow, nothing will make a noise, and nothing will move. Nothing will happen at all, and Digitanus will be frozen in time and space at the end of its universe (V3.5).

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