The Paradox Boxes

    In 2024 I thought to remake boxes because of all the corrugated cardboard packaging that arrived in the mail, or from Amazon Prime, Jerry’s Artarama, Blick Art, Puritan’s Pride, Epson and other corporate sources every week. It seemed somehow tragic to, rip, cut, and smash all those boxes into the recycle bin. So, I thought to combine my meditation practice, art making, ideas about quantum theory with the Japanese conceptualization of contained space as something more intimate and spiritual – concepts like MA (negative space), Tsutsumi (wrapping), and Oku (deepening inwardness). And I thought to ask some questions about contained space, packaging and spirituality. 

 1. Can I transform the throw-away junk of a capitalist consumption-based civilization into more deeply spirited art objects? 

 2. What if these boxes / containers have no lid or opening device? 

 3. What is the meaning of an art object that obviously has something inside but cannot be or is demonstrably not to be opened. 

 4. If I put something that is so terribly limited into the potential of the contained space (Ma) that is decorated and wrapped in art about spirit and infinity (Tsutsumi) will that somehow open or relieve the constraint? 

 5. Can I do this to objects / concepts of political restraint? 

 6. Can I do this to forms of hate / prejudice? 

 7. Why not put wishes / prayers in the containers. 

 8. Can I place my fears, anger and hate into a boxes and hope that the Ma, Tsutsumi and Oku will help me to transform my limited spirit? 

 9. What if the repurposed box is empty? 

 10. What if I deconstruct the delivered box and make a new totally different kind of box? 

 11. What if the completely remade object is empty? 

 12. What does all this have to do with my own person as an aging gay, white middle class American in the final decade or (If I’m lucky) two decades of a long life? 

 13. Can I contain irony and send it out into the universe? 

 14. Who cares, other than me? 

     To date, I have made 66 of these decorated containers. My goal is to have 100 Paradox Boxes by the end of this year 2026. All of them are decorated with images of my artwork about initial singularities, convergent universes, and color transparency. Most have things inside, some do not. None of them have lids or openings because none of them are meant to be opened. I keep a catalog of the boxes that lists the kind and size of each shape as well as that which it contains. I think of the catalog as an art object in its own rite.

Here are some recent Convergent Universes (part of the Initial Singularities series). I have this notion that multiple universes exist in separate dimensions and times. These digital and actual paintings show what it would look like if I could see convergent universes folding through one another.The first two paintings are entirely digital and I have printed them as 12" x 12" images , the third is created in real space using acrylic paint and is also 12" x 12". I have made more than fifty of these paintings, digital and / or acrylic.

Initial Singularities, Other Dimensions / Universes and Queer Icons:

In the continuing "Singularities" series I am playing with a sci-fi notion of infinite universes charted by a super-intergalactic civilization (Far, far away in both time and space). I also use them as spiritual tool or charm in meditation. Additionally, they are based in my identity as a gay man and part of the LGBTQ movement in the arts. They do these things by referencing the spectrum and rainbow using color transparency, brushed acrylic paint and stencils.

Social and Political Commentary

These two paintings are examples of my social and political commentary, and were made during the COVID pandemic (2020 – 2021). I use acrylic paints, ink, digital images taken from the masters, plus my own photos and drawing. I work back and forth between actual and virtual (digital) processes sometimes using décollage techniques to unite the various processes.

I've been on sabbatical for too long!

I will be posting on my current work. First, political and social commentary artworks made using digital processes blended and alternating with painting in actual physical space. Second, "Initial Singularities and other Universes" are prints created in Photoshop and paintings created in actual physical space. I also write poetry that tracks with both kinds of artwork. The following are two examples from the second category, "Initial Singularities and Other Universes.

“Faggot” - Double Page Spread for the LGBTQ Pictionary

The notion that the term "faggot" originates with the English, faggot, a bundle of sticks is likely. However, the word is not associated with burning homosexuals alive at the stake. The term does denote various sized and kinds of bundles of sticks, and these were standardized in 1474 by ordinance.* Alternatively the word has been used to describe a cigarette (British), and a kind of sausage meatball, also British.

The first recorded use of faggot or fag to denote a homosexual man in the USA took place in 1914, and, common use of the term faggot and the shortened version, fag to denote homosexual men and women is found by 1921. These terns are extremely pejorative though by the late 1970’s the LGBT community was actively reacquiring such derogatory terms to be used in a positive prideful manor. Fag and faggot have gradually fallen out of use. Instead, the (pejorative) “that's so gay” became more common during the 1980's. Cultural and social processes have gradually removed the stigma attached to "gay" as well. In the second decade of the 21st Century "gay" is understood as a more positive way of referring to homosexual men and/or women.

In this mixed media distressed painting I was expressing these historical aspects, cultural and social trends. The painting includes references to the centuries old “Fag” family name, to faggot, a bundle of sticks, and to cigarette as fag. It contains images of late 19th century and early 20th century sepia photos of male couples, as well as text about the word and its various significations buried in the layers of paint.*1 The text in the double page spread is different from and more detailed than the text in this blog.

Notes

*Link to details about these measurements

*1 I obtained many of the sepia images from the Website, Homo History and kept a careful log and record of these.

The Newest Art Card Is Serenity

Card, side 1

Card, side 2

During the Trump presidency discord, bad behavior and incivility have reached fever pitch though as a culture we have been trending in that direction for decades. I believe with great certainty that unless many of us act individually to counteract the cultural and social trend our democracy is doomed to go down in social and political anarchy. Because of that belief I began making the Art Cards as my individual effort to affect change in 2013. I design the cards and have them printed in batches of 250 each so that I can give them to random persons, sometimes face to face, other times anonymously. I also put them in public spaces where they can be picked up or ignored. I am not making the cards to be revolutionary because that would be foolish. I don’t show them in the traditional style of the Art World, for sale in art galleries. Instead they are meant to be gifts made to others. I know that the vast majority of the cards end up lost or trashed and I also know that this effort does little or nothing to cause change. But, I hope that the gift of these cards might inspire a few people here and there over time to join in the effort to create peace, love, joy, harmony, and serenity through their own kind efforts toward others. At the same time I understand my hope to be a Metamodern trope that goes just a touch beyond postmodern irony. *

I titled the two sides of the card side 1 and side 2 because neither side takes priority over the other. One is based on a photograph I took in 2010. The other is also photographic, but I took the photo of a section of sky in one of the seascape pastels I've created during the past 20 years. The typography, orange and yellow colors added to the pastel image, and photos of the birds are used to establish unity between the two sides of the card. In fact I have used more photography in this card than in each of the other five cards, and I'm pleased with the result.

Note

• Art during the 20th and 21st century is thought by artists, theorist and art critics to fit into three periods, modern, postmodern and metamodern. Metamodern is the most recent of these and readers can discover something about it at the following location, http://www.metamodernism.com/.

Transwoman: Double Page Spread

I’m working on the proposal for a book based on the LGBTQ Pictionary. This new double page spread is only the third of ten that includes the front and back covers of the book. Once Again I have 3 possible versions of this double page spread with type indication where future text will be. I have my preference but I will not say which one until I have some from friends on Facebook because I’m curious to see how the opinions compare to mine.

A.

Interestingly, responses to the “Transman” double page spread were evenly divided between choices “B” and “C.” Because of those responses I will make a simple change to choice “C” in order to make it work a bit more like “B” visually, that is to make the area of type slightly larger in order to make the page fit the ancient Greek golden mean (proportion 8 to 1). In conclusion, viewer opinion helped me come to the best possible solution.

Please write your choice, "A," "B" or "C" on my post in Facebook.

B.

C.

Gender Variant and Trans Woman Paintings Finished

At Last, they are done!

I took one day ignoring all other problems and issues to finish both paintings. Now I move on to producing more double page spreads for a possible book based on the LGBTQ Pictionary.

Below are 3 examples of a page from the book. The type is indicated.  I make indicated type by reversing it and flipping it upside down.  It is not the actual text. I like example "C" with the small square of type in the center of the page, but I hope to get some votes from friends on Facebook as to which they like best.

A

B

C

Transgender - Gender Variant Pronouns

In 70’s I am increasingly forgetful. During work on this set of layers in the 6” square window transparency I forgot to make a layer of oil to separate new paint from the dechirage and paint below. When the layer dried and I distressed the paint it came off of the exposed paint below, but not the laminated layer of dechirage paper in the square. In order to make the mistake work, I took a new photo and put it into Adobe Photoshop. Printed the image, and tore it apart, finally laminating some of the torn pieces back into the 6” central window. I am so pleased with the result! It is better than if my memory had functioned properly.

I plan another smaller square within the 6” square. And that square will have my makeshift definition of gender variant pronouns. That may finish this mixed media distressed painting - or not. I won’t know until I see the artwork with the smaller square added.

Transwoman: Not Finished As Planned

I tried to go beyond this step with more glitter stripes around other areas in the mixed media distressed painting, but so far I haven’t been successful with these. I always try shapes, photos and buried text in different locations in Adobe Photoshop before gluing the actual physical things in place and or painting over them and distressing the paint. I experiment with locations until everything seems to be absolutely correct visually. After 2 hours of deliberation the image has the definition added to the central 2-inch square plus the glitter box surrounding it. I will add more glitter stripes after I sleep on it tonight. Once the subconscious has had time to ruminate I’m sure the solution to final glitter stripes location will happen on the conscious level.

Gender Variant: Stage 3

The final artwork in the series of 4 mixed media distressed paintings about transgendered people delves into language and “gender nonconformity.” The painting has 12 layers at this stage, and will have at least 4 more over the entire surface after which I will be working on smaller segments of the surface to completion. There is no way to know what the painting will look like when finished because of the unpredictable nature of this process, though I do use some line, color and shape toward the end of the process to superimpose order onto the accidental nature of the work. The painting is done mostly in blues, red and pink at this stage because pink and blue are the colors of the transgender flag.

Can you find the miss spelled words? I am the worlds worst speller, and I must check everything several times. Also, as I age my spelling is deteriorating. I missed 2 in this stage. Since it will be painted over and distressed I am not overly distressed (pun intended) about them because they will probably be hidden. However, I best be more careful in the next stage of the work.

Trans Woman Heroes: Next to Final State

I am overcome with distress (pun intended)

As I create these mixed media distressed partially digital art works I’ve learned so much about the heroism of trans people and their fight for recognition. I learned that they are no different from the rest of us, with that one small exception; they are born in the wrong body. By way of example, black trans woman Lucy Hicks Anderson, pictured in the top of “Trans Woman” was tried for marrying her soldier boy friend. They were taken to court, fought the US government over her trans status, and were convicted of perjury and fraud by Federal courts. They were both imprisoned. She died at age 68 in 1954 still living her life as a woman. She was a trans woman hero as were all the other women pictured in the painting.

About Process

In the final steps of this painting I will make a small 2” square centered within the larger distressed pale blue square. This smaller square will include the “Trans Woman” headline. However, I’m not sure of the colors I will use, nor how or whether I will distress the definition and the text in the square. Perhaps that little square will contain 2 or more layers of digitized torn paper sandwiched between distressed layers of paint, and laminated into the montage. Also, there will be torn stripes of actual glitter enhanced photographed glitter laminated around and through portions of the entire painting. These are process questions and I will make decisions as I continue my work. I do know that the end of this process is in sight.

Transwoman: Stage 4

This is the mixed media distressed painting in its current Adobe Photoshop state, layer 11. I will print "stage 4" using the large format printer, tear it up, and laminate some of the pieces – there’s a secret step at this point - onto the canvas board. After doing the dechirage (torn paper) I will once again cover everything with oil crayon and coat all with a heavy layer of opaque tempera, then scrape through everything. The painting will not be finished. Instead there will be at least 3 to 6 more layers to go. I usually work on 2 to 4 paintings simultaneously because I am constantly waiting for layers to dry on each painting.

So, I have begun another mixed media distressed painting, this one titled, "Two Spirits." The terms is not technically an LGBTQ term. Rather it is a term that refers to indigenous peoples, many cultures worldwide in which gender-diverse roles (boy and girl, neither, or other) are not only acceptable but understood as "normal," sometimes special, even spiritual in nature. From now on I will alternate work on the two paintings, Transwoman and Two Spirits.*

*"Normal" in Western cultures is understood to apply to a large group of people or things that are supposed to be similar. Mathematically, the concept "normal," norm is one number in the exact center of a set of numbers. In anthropology - the study of human cultures - "normal" as used in the West cannot be applied to other cultures, and is an inappropriate trope as used in our culture.

Trans Woman (Transwoman): History's Heroines - Stage 3

As I work on each painting in the LGBTQ Pictionary, I learn more and more about human sexuality in general, and the heroism of LGBTQ people in particular. “Trans Woman” is the exception, not for the lack of heroism, but because so many women risked their lives, reputation, happiness, love, everything that we as humans find valuable. So far I’ve buried in layers of paint such women as Lucy Hicks Anderson, Sir Lady Java, Rene Richards, and Jacqueline Charlotte Dufresnoy (Coccinelle) At times I have been brought to tears reading of their heroism, and these are literally buried in the layers of paint, paper, glue and computer ink along with these heroic trans women. These "Trans Women" are heroines!

Today I will cover Stage 3 of “Transwoman” with oil crayon once again, and bury the image you see here completely with a layer of blue paint. While that is drying I will move on to put the first layer of paint on the new LGBTQ Pictionary painting, “Transvestia,” a painting about the magazine of that name from the 1970’s and 1980’s of the last century.

Transwoman: Stage One

Researching the topic, "Trans Woman (Transwoman), history" I discovered the amazing courage of trans women who fought against societal prejudice at a tune when the culture was unable to hypothesize or picture anything beyond the physical embodiment of binary sexuality. As the artist producing this artwork my attitude and understanding of trans women is important in the conceptualization of the mixed media distressed painting. It is my belief that we are closest to God at birth and death, before our cultural identity is formed and at the moment we leave our culture and return to God. The modern medical/psychological term used to describe the condition of mental anguish Trans women and men experience is "gender dysphoria."* I see gender dysphoria as a cultural phenomenon, not an individual personality issue. In other words it is the culture that puts the onus on the condition, and trans women  as individuals absorb the disconnect. Trans women are simply born in the wrong body and they have no choice other than to fix the culturally induced gender dysphoria. Fortunately, modern medicine is able to help though the process is terribly expensive and so prohibits many from achieving the goal of being content in their own body.

In the first layer of “Transwoman” I chose two women. First, Lucy Hicks Anderson (Tobias Lawson), a black Transwoman living at a time (1886-1954) when she was doubly cursed by her culture as, one, a black, two, trans woman. She was jailed two times because she insisted on living as a woman. Second, Renee’ Richards, who fought the United States Tennis Association (USTA) in order to participate on the national stage as a female player after her transition, male to female.

This layer will be buried beneath many more as part of the process of building history into the painting. It may become completely hidden or not as the process is accidental and I (the artist) have only partial control. That is why I am documenting the creation of these artworks. I am hoping that the book about the “LGBTQ Pictionary” will be published in order to clarify and elevate knowledge about the strength of these many LGBTQ people and their effort to achieve equality against so Brobdingnagian a cultural blockade.

Notes

*Gender dysphoria involves a conflict between a person's physical or assigned gender and the gender with which he/she/they identify. People with gender dysphoria may be very uncomfortable with the gender they were assigned, sometimes described as being uncomfortable with their body (particularly developments during puberty) or being uncomfortable with the expected roles of their assigned gender.

People with gender dysphoria may often experience significant distress and/or problems functioning associated with this conflict between the way they feel and think of themselves (referred to as experienced or expressed gender) and their physical or assigned gender.*

"What is Gender Dysphoria," The American Psychological Association, https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/gender-dysphoria/what-is-gender-dysphoria. Ranna Parekh, M.D., M.P.H.February 2016, viewed11:17 AM EST Friday, November 17, 2017.

Trans Man: LGBTQ Pictionary

3 Steps to Go

Trans Man (10" x 10"), Mixed Media & Distressed Paint

I've been working on three other artworks at the same time, so it will be a week or so before I get back to finish this mixed media distressed painting. But, there are just 3 steps including signing and then “Trans Man” will be done. I took this photo of the artwork in full sun outdoors, temp 75 degrees F, 200 ASA, at 100th of a second, f 5.6, and yes all that does matter, especially to focus and colors of the image. I did purposefully play with the color of the printed sections of the image in the previous stage of work so that the transparencies in the dechirage sections would be slightly different in hue from the original paint colors. I also spent a great deal of extra time on this painting because of printer issues that caused colors to be entirely too light. However, that problem is now resolved and the painting is back on track.

Transman is based on the amazing history of transgender people. These include people like Billy Tipton, the late great Jazz pianist, Wilmer M.“Little Axe” Broadax, gospel singer, Charley Parkhurst, gold rush days whip, Alan Hart M.D., and many more. I also include images and text about modern transmen of note as well, hidden to varying degree in the layers of distressed paint and paper.

I know these last three artworks from the LGBTQ Pictionary, based on transgender people to be important because of our White Suprematist president. At the same time I never thought that I would be embarrassed by my skin color. However, I also happen to be part of one of the other groups at which this president and his government have taken aim. The groups include people of the Muslim faith, illegal Latino immigrants, all people of color, and LGBTQ people. The most egregious act of president Trump to date (there have been so many) has been his order to remove transgender people from the military. Trans Man is one of three works that speak to my grave concerns about the Donald J. Trump presidency.

Taking A Stand Through My Art

As an artist with a political conscience I have designed a postcard that I place in stores and libraries, post on bulletin boards, and post in other public locations. I am also in the process of sending the cards to Republican Senator and Congressional Representatives whose voting record demonstrates an extremely high correlation with DJT. As I have written on the back of the postcard, "We are not Democratic. We are not Republican. We are the people." I have distributed 30 of these to date and will continue to do so as I travel. I may design others as the Trump presidency continues. I feel it is my duty as an artist citizen to fight this frightening turn to the false science of eugenics, radical racism, and white supremacist politics that resides in the Whitehouse, and through it, the department of Justice of the United States.*

*The series of mixed media distressed paintings that I call The LGBTQ Dictionary are also political, especially the current new artworks in the series, titled Trans/Transgender, Trans Man, and Trans Woman as they express an opposition to the presidents order to remove all transgender persons from the military.

New LGBTQ Pictionary entry, "Transman"

Trans Man / Transman

The first layer of “Transman” will be buried under many more layers of paint, glue and images. Actually it is the second layer, the first being the flat blue acrylic foundation. The layer includes photos and text about historical trans men figures. These include Dr. Alan Hart, specialist in roentgenology, (x-rays), Charley Darkey Parkhurst, Gold Rush Whip, Wilmer “Little Ax” Broadax, a gospel Quartet singer, and Lou Sullivan, first trans man to self identify as gay, an author and activist. These "men" should be some of the real heroes of LGBTQ people as they performed their actual racial, gender and sexual identity at a time when discovery meant social death if not actual physical termination. As this first and second layer is buried in more layers of oil crayon paint, paper, and glue, these same images may occur again. It is hard to predict what or which will happen as I will be motivated by accidental lines, shapes and colors created as I add coating after coating to the painting. Also, the nature of the mixed media distressed paint technique reveals parts of lower coatings randomly as though one is looking back through time. *

Notes

1. Lout Sullivan, Wikipedia at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lou_Sullivan. Last updated August 2, 2017. Viewed 10:43 PM, EDT, Thursday, August 10, 2017.

2. Alan Lucill Hart (1890 1962) doctor, roentgenologist, novelist, in A Gender Varianc Who’s who, https://zagria.blogspot.com/2008/10/alan-lucill-hart-1890-1962-doctor.html#.WYn4hiMrK2w. Pulbished October 20, 2008, viewed 1:52 PM EDT, Tuesday, August, 8, 2017.

3. 5 Amazing Trans Men You Didn’t Learn About in History Class, Pride.com at https://www.pride.com/transgender/2016/7/28/5-amazing-trans-men-you-didnt-learn-about-history-class. Viewed 3:31 EDT, Monday, August 7, 2017.

Trans/Trany (12" x 12") mixed media distressed painting is subversive

I finished the LGBTQ Pictionary artwork, “Trans,” a 12-inch square, mixed media distressed painting in May well before president Trump attacked trans people in the military with his series of tweets of July 26, 2017. As clarification, I quote the 3 infamous tweets together here.

“After consultation with my Generals and military experts, please be advised that the United States Government will not accept or allow Transgender individuals to serve in any capacity in the U. S. Military. Our military must be focused on decisive and overwhelming victory and cannot be burdened with the tremendous medical costs and disruption that transgender in the military would entail. Thank you.”

He hadn’t consulted with (not "his" but "our") generals. In fact they were taken by surprise, as was the nation because it was understood that Trans people were not only to be tolerated, but accepted as a talented part of our military based on President Obama’s policy pronounced on June 30, 2016. And, in fact the joint chiefs of staff have stated that there will be no change in policy until they receive direct clarification from the president.

I never thought that post Obama I’d be living in a country in which the government would once again attack minority after minority, trans people but the latest to be singled out by this president. Now I see The LGBTQ Pictionary in a new light. It is a subversive tool, set against a government that once again is acting against the people it is supposed to protect.